A Cold Drift

I thought we were doing better. Crisis was averted and I was fine again. Now you don't want to talk to me, and you won't say you love me. Pretty much once a week for the last couple of months, you've told me you don't want to lose me. For the last 2 months, you said it feels like i'm pulling away from you. You were wrong, I was getting closer. You were the one pulling away. And you still are. You're pushing me away from you, when I just want to help you and be close to you again. It's breaking my heart. I don't want to cry myself to sleep every night wishing you were here to hold me. This thing that you're doing is hurting more than you know. On the opposite spectrum, I know we don't belong together. I can feel it in my heart. The guy I fell in love with, the guy that I said yes to when I proposed, he's gone missing. He's disappeared into thin air, and I don't think he's coming back. That guy told me he gave up some stuff so he could be with me. That guy would've never lied to me or stolen from me. This new guy insists that these things are a part of who he is, and if I can't accept them, then we can't be together. The only way I can be fine with them though, is if you don't taunt me with them like you did this morning. It was unacceptable. I love you with all my heart, but this is where my turn is. Our story isn't finished yet. I'm still going to try to reasons that even I don't understand. I hope I can make you happy again, and I hope I end up being wrong. But with the way this is heading, I don't think I will be. It's only a matter of time before one of us snaps and gives up. I can't end this on a happy note. I'm too far down and i'm only sinking further.